Moving Peaces - Page 6 of 46 - Moving Pieces. Moving Places. Moving Peacefully.

This Week’s Three

August 14, 2015Samantha Gratton

Yep, I failed at writing my Thursday Three on Thursday, so this will have to do. It’s been a full week, lots of good and a bit of not-so-good, but by the end of each day, I feel spent and then I realize I can’t do it all.

1. The less you have, the less you lose. There are times we all want more. More feels good and makes us feel like we have more worth and must have accomplished more to acquire more. But living with less means you rely on less, so when something happens it doesn’t carry as great of an impact. This week I got rear-ended so my car is super scratched up (it’s a long story and kind of strange) and our air conditioning went out. The good news is, we don’t have fancy cars, and we don’t own our home. So, the car might just look like that for now. And thankfully, we don’t have to pay for the A/C to get fixed as renters. In the meantime, we were supplied a small window unit to cool our home which might not have cut it, but thankfully we keep our home at a balmy 81 degrees in the summer so we hardly felt a difference.

2. Being active is awesome. I don’t have a gym membership, I don’t have a set fitness routine and I don’t have any shakes to sell. I do try to live an active lifestyle though, so instead of meeting for coffee I might say “let’s go on a walk”, and I’m always up for a bike ride or a game of tennis. This week included all of those things, and I loved every second of it, despite the North Carolina humidity.

3. School supply season is always a little inspirational. I may have spent far too long wandering the aisles of crayons, pencils and erasers this week. I carefully chose a planner and a new notebook and thought of all the days to come. It’s the start of a new season and regardless of how many years it has been since I’ve been a student, I always think of fall as the start of a new year. New pens and planner in hand, I’m ready for it!

Can’t Do It All

August 12, 2015August 12, 2015Samantha Gratton

There are days (or weeks) like today that I don’t want to write. Or rather, I’d love to write but can’t figure out what to say. There are plenty of thoughts swirling around my head, recent failures I could admit to/learn from and random activities occurring, but it doesn’t seem like enough. Or maybe I don’t feel like enough.

It always starts out good. I run around for a few days, tackle the to-do list, write something I’m proud of, have great conversations with people and feel almost accomplished with life. Then I crash.

I want to be the person who can do it all. I want to have all the right things to say or write about, but I also want to be present where I’m at. I want to work hard but know how and when to rest. I want to push the limits but not get hurt. I want to have strong relationships with people but don’t want to be a people pleaser.

That nonstop, good-at-life thing doesn’t seem sustainable somehow, which feels like I must be doing something wrong. Failing is not fun. I’d love to tell you that I am able to always dust my shoulders off and keep shooting for the stars but that wouldn’t be true. Instead, I cry (literally) and kick myself (figuratively) as I try and fail (or fail to try) all over again.

This isn’t a pity party. There’s so much good in my life and in a matter of hours or days I’ll be right back to ticking off my never-ending to-do list. No, this is just the reality. I can’t be all the things to all the people or do all the things on all the lists. I have expectations of myself that can’t always be met and the only way to re-align them is to change the measurement stick and show some vulnerabilities.

Thursday Three

August 6, 2015August 7, 2015Samantha Gratton

Every hour in my day seems to fly on by and suddenly it’s Thursday. I feel like I can’t keep up with the clock…it just keeps going. Whew. Welcome to the (almost) weekend. You made it!

1. Growing up is like growing a garden. We’ve loved having a garden this summer–there’s nothing quite like some fresh tomatoes and basil (with cheese, of course). We’ve expanded this year’s garden to also include okra, spinach, cucumber, kale and a few herbs. But let me just say, it takes work. It requires daily attention, cutting out the bad and elements completely outside of our control (like good weather and no rabbits). In the same way, personal growth and development takes time and effort, working through and eliminating the bad and faithfully waiting through the variables we simply cannot control. A garden is the perfect reminder of that process.

2. We all have strengths and talents. Mine just happens to be writing incredible to-do lists. While you may never see me performing that in a talent show, it’s still pretty significant and can help out the people around me. So, use your talent. Even if it doesn’t belong in a frame or on a stage, it can still make an impact.

3. Rest is important. We live in a culture that praises busy and expects constant work. The problem is, that’s not sustainable, healthy or necessary. Yes, use your strengths but also, set aside time for rest. You can and should take some time to rest every day, every week, every month and every year. Take a break. It’ll be okay.

Living in the Little

August 4, 2015August 5, 2015Samantha Gratton

Every year I make a photo album to reflect what the year was about–what we did, who we spent time with, what our life looked like. Without fail, it never comes close to reflecting what the year actually looked like. Instead, it has the trip photos, rare gatherings with out-of-town guests and maybe a snapshot of an activity we did.

Right now I feel like I’m in a make or break moment. But am I really? Is this a big moment or is this just like all of the other little ones?

So much of life isn’t lived in the big moments. Those may be the times that you caught a photo or you are acknowledged for it, but it isn’t what got you to where you are today. It’s the little every day, seemingly no-big-deal decisions that propel you forward in the direction you’re going.

What I wore in my 5th grade class photo or what major I chose in college doesn’t define me now. Not even moving across the country or my wedding day, those monumental, meaningful days, truly define right now. They have an impact, absolutely. But it wasn’t my wedding day that made me a good wife. It’s not my location that makes me a part of a community. It’s not having a major in journalism that makes me a writer. (And thankfully my sense of style was not solidified in elementary school.)

It’s waking up every morning saying, I love you and making a daily commitment to my marriage. It’s being a friend and a presence with the people around me that makes me a part of this community. It’s sitting down and writing several times a week that makes me a writer.

It’s how you spend your days–those long days of effort and dedication in the little moments. The hourly, daily, weekly decisions may seem insignificant, but that’s what most shapes your life over time.

Thursday Three

July 30, 2015Samantha Gratton

It’s that time. Time for the weekend to be here and time to look back on the past week. Let’s do it.

1. You are stronger than you think you are. Put that on a cat poster. This week a friend of ours invited us to use his guest pass at a local climbing gym, and it was pretty awesome. I’m short and clumsy, so rock climbing may not be best suited for someone like me, but I went anyway. The majority of the time we were bouldering (read: no ropes), so I was hesitant to get very high or make bold leaps. By the end of the night though I had taken more risks and walked away with pleasantly sore arms and blistered hands as my reward. Worth it.

2. Ask for help anyway. It’s not dumb to ask for help. We all have stressful things happening from time to time and it’s okay (or even good) to ask a friend for help when you need it. Or just to listen. Sometimes listening is more helpful than anything.

3. Reflect a little. Take a quick summary of the things happening in your life. You might be surprised at how much is going your way. There might still be bad and hard and ugly, but it’s important to see life as a whole sometimes and not get bogged down by the details, good or bad. Oh my gosh, and don’t let me tell you how to live your life. These are some of the things I tell myself…and if you want to listen that’s up to you.

Disposable Society

July 28, 2015July 28, 2015Samantha Gratton

We live in a world of disposable things. Styrofoam cups, paper plates, plastic bags–you’ll probably find at least one of these in every house in America. While there’s a long-term option, these offer a certain convenience. No need to protect them, no worry of damage, no obligation or responsibility.

Every so often we “upgrade” our phones to get a new one. The longevity of one of our most prized possessions is rarely longer than two years. We don’t attempt to fix or restore, just get another. Same thing goes for your TV, vacuum, camera, furniture, clothes and likely countless other items.

We see and experience a lot of transition. We move more often and are greater distances apart. We hold more jobs in the first five years of our career than our grandparents had their entire life. We have the technology at our fingertips to “connect” with anybody at anytime and more options than ever before with how to live our lives.

But how does this impact our relationships? Our friendships, our jobs and our communities? If almost everything in our lives is replaceable, when do we learn to value, respect and cherish what we have? How do we shift our disposable mindset to long-lasting, committed relationships?

Instead of disposable, committed relationships means both parties pledge to make it work and work things out. The kind of relationship that starts great, but when something goes awry, you stick with it anyway. You decide to struggle through and mend what was broken. (Band-aid fixes and shallow apologies are far from real repair.) There’s trust and grace and communication, but when those fail, you try again. You see the value in what was and what can be.

Sure, a fresh start seems easier and has a greater appeal than wading through the mess. Yes, there are times when moving on is natural or absolutely necessary. But more often, I think we get scared. We protect ourselves from heartache by never really committing in the first place. We give up when it gets hard or complicated. We avoid the tough conversations or the truth. We write off anyone that has ever hurt us. We walk away, find someone new and then do it all over again.

Often, we want the ease and comfort of relationships, but none of the work. In the end, we have more acquaintance-level relationships than we can count, but no one we trust to share our hopes and dreams, fears and failures.

Commit to the work. Agree to the hard part. Struggle through the awkwardness. Reach out with the truth or an apology. Find the middle ground. Be willing to open up and also ask questions. Invest, mend and restore. Build relationships but don’t discard them. Make the effort. Don’t give up.

Thursday Three

July 23, 2015July 29, 2015Samantha Gratton

This week has been a lot of things. Some weeks you just can’t articulate everything, so here’s three of those things.

1. Writing inspiration. Jon Acuff happened to be in town, and I decided to head on over to the local bookstore to hear what he had to say. A best-selling author of a few books (like Do Over and Quitter), he had a lot of good things to say but was also a pretty normal guy. It’s normal people who often do incredible things…you just have to do it. Sometimes we can get caught up with all of the obstacles, but then we don’t even put the time in to do the work. Start with doing.

2. A celebration of marriage. Weddings such a fun time of celebrating two people who have committed to spend their lives together. The hubby was a groomsman in the wedding this past weekend, so we got all dressed up, enjoyed time with friends and spent some time on the dance floor.

3. A life lesson of sorts. Through a long series of events, my sister lost her keys and therefore left her car unattended for a night over the weekend in a less than safe part of town. It was a bit of a mess to handle, especially when we later found out the car had been broken into. Insurance and AAA came in handy, but it was a long couple of days sorting it all out. I suppose the life lessons being, don’t ever lose your keys, bad things happen and you can’t plan for everything. Then it might start raining. What are you going to do?

Give Me the Truth

July 21, 2015Samantha Gratton

I think we’re all grasping for truths in this world. We want to find the things that seem right, and we chase after those truths whether we realize it or not.

Anything from watching your favorite tv show or sports team to reading all the adventures and life lessons discovered in a memoir or novel has an element of seeking truth. Music speaks volumes and art speaks to the heart. Travel opens our minds to new experiences. Quotes and scriptures give us hope. We want to know there is meaning and worth out there, that there is truth. We want to know that the good guy always wins–maybe not the short game, but definitely the long game.

So, we ask the questions, have the long talks and grapple at what that truth is.

The hard part is knowing the truth from the narrative.

Perhaps the stories we’ve been told say disappointment will result in one thing and success looks like so. A mold of what something should look like takes over as we strive for the best and pursue truths we’ve been seeking. Outside influences bring ideas and opinions to the table, presenting their stories as truth. We sometimes re-shape and twist the narrative in our own attempt to create what is true, often distorting reality.

Not everything you hear, read, see or think is true.

It’s a struggle to keep truth at the forefront, but worthwhile. So choose wisely what you decide to believe and what you form your life around. Know who or what is speaking into your life and if it really is true. Where is your source of truth coming from? What lies are you believing as truths, and what truths are you ignoring?

Thursday Three

July 16, 2015July 16, 2015Samantha Gratton

It’s been an entire week yet somehow my to-do list is quite long and my to-done list is oh-so short so far. But some weeks you just have to roll with the punches and appreciate what happened, regardless of what was accomplished.

1. Travel adventures. A few months ago, my sister-in-law and I thought it would be fun to take a trip together and this weekend it was finally time. Not only did we go on a bit of a whim, but we went on a serious budget and managed to see Charleston and Savannah for about $150 each (including gas). How? Couchsurfing, lots of snacks and prioritizing. It can be done.

2. Free food. Oh yeah, it was Chick-fil-A Day this week…you know, the day you dress like a cow for some free chicken. While some may refer to it as trading your dignity for a free sandwich, I say it was totally worth it. We even managed to come for both lunch and dinner (which they totally encouraged). Delicious.

3. Quality time. Maybe I’m behind in all sorts of things or my house is far from tidy, but I’ve gotten to spend some great quality time with the people in my life lately. To me, time is invaluable, and I’ve loved every minute of the time well spent with friends this past week. I’ll take it!

Thursday Three

July 10, 2015July 10, 2015Samantha Gratton

This was a week of simply being, so I’ve got three things to be more often.

1. Be willing. Some opportunities are there, you just have to be willing to take them. This is definitely one of those, you-never-know-what-could-happen kind of things…but for real…you never know. I took a chance this week on a few of those opportunities. Not sure how they’ll turn out, but so glad to know that I went for it anyway. Sometimes it’s just a matter of extending the invitation, hitting the submit button or doing that thing you said you were going to do ages ago.

2. Be thoughtful. Who is someone that wants to hear from you right now? Who can you be a good friend to or how can you brighten someone’s day?

3. Be spontaneous. I’m a big planner so spontaneity is something I enjoy but not something that always happens. The highlight of my week by far was this impromptu, dressed up date night. When you realize you have an old Groupon, and you’re pretty hungry at 9 o’clock on a Sunday night, it’s suddenly an adventure.