marriage

Making it “Official”

Making it “Official”

Samantha Gratton

In case you didn’t notice, we live in the times of the internet. We have a lot of information right at our fingertips and hardly even know what a day without instant access to all our social media sources is like.

News comes from posts and photos as people share the prominent or pretty parts of their lives with the rest of the “network”…because that’s just what we do. To avoid posting something requires almost a special request or reason to not include it online. Just like that, so much of our lives are shared and revealed to the masses.

I write and say random tidbits about my days, so I’m hardly any different. But I also try to think long and hard about what it is I’m saying and why. Do I share because I feel compelled to do so? Or because it would be useful to know? Or because I just had a really great hair day? So many thoughts and decisions on what’s best, especially in the past few months, have caused me to step back and withdraw from social media and even blogging for a bit. The problem is, eventually people think you’re hiding. And then you question what it is you’re hiding from and why? If you don’t share it online, are you embarrassed or overly secretive or just overthinking it?

This. This has been my constant cycle of thoughts recently as, quite frankly, we’ve found ourselves with some BIG news. News that can’t be summed up in one description or emoji. Unlike what our social media networks and text-based conversations would suggest, we can’t relate on the same level with people as we can face-to-face or in a one-on-one conversation. Simply giving something a heart or a star or a thumbs up doesn’t sit well with me anymore. I want to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. Blasting a bit of news doesn’t allow me to do those things quite the way I’d like to.

But social media forces us share in abrupt snippets. Even if we don’t, eventually someone will leak the info online or a photo will surface, and we can’t “hide” from the news–be it good or bad. Let’s be honest, I don’t think most news is quite so simple as only good or bad. Sometimes there’s excitement and panic and confusion and pain and joy and whatever you had for lunch today mixed in all at once.

Our big news? We’re expecting. We’ve actually been expecting for several months now. Expecting to have a baby and become parents and find out just how much that completely changes our lives.

But you? I don’t know what’s going on with you or how you feel about that. Maybe you’re thrilled. Maybe that news hurts to hear. Maybe you wish it was you. Maybe you’re glad it’s not. Maybe you’re wondering why the heck it took so long for me to say something. Maybe you really don’t care. Whatever it is, I don’t get to experience what you’re experiencing on the other side of the screen here. Perhaps that’s for the best, but I feel I’d be remiss to ignore that my news causes something for you, too. To be honest, it causes more than one simple emotion for me as well.

We don’t know what we’re doing or where life will take us from here, but we’re expectant. Expecting that we’ll somehow figure it out together and also lean on trusted people around us. Expecting to be challenged in new ways and to learn a few things the hard way, no matter how much we try to best prepare. Expecting to walk alongside friends who are in the same stage of life as well as with those who aren’t. Expecting to make sacrifices and expecting to find new sources of joy and inspiration.

S+S on the steps-4952

 

 

 

Five Years

Samantha Gratton

Wedding Day | Moving Peaces

Five years.

Five sweet, short, long, hard, crazy, wonderful years, and here we are.

We’re different than when we first met. Our goals have the same roots but have grown and changed just as we have. Our quirks and personalities, while still uniquely ours, have shifted over time. We’ve experienced pain and loss, just as we’ve experienced joy and grace.

I can’t say that life together has been everything we planned or expected. There’s no way we could imagine how we’d grow and change over time. We’ve taken on some incredible adventures and challenges I never would have dreamed we’d face. It is impossible to sum up all of the emotions and fun we have had. I cannot pretend it’s all been easy, but I also know it’s been more than worth it.

Five years ago we were two kids in love. Today, we’re still two kids in love, but somehow in an entirely different way.

Happy Anniversary to my very favorite person. 

 

The Big News

The Big News

Samantha Gratton

2015–this year’s going to be a big one. It will bring change and challenge, questions and joy. I mean it. As much as I haven’t quite figured out all of this year’s goals, I know it will be a big one in our lives. We’ll be coming up on five years of marriage and will have been in North Carolina longer than Iowa in our married life. Change is inevitable in our jobs, as it is with our friendships and families.

Were you expecting something else? Oh, yeah.

It seems like half the people I know are buying houses or having babies. It makes sense, I suppose. It’s the “next step” and I am so, SO excited for all of them. They will all be wonderful parents and homeowners, families and neighbors. I really mean it, too. We’re fortunate to be friends with some amazing people, and I am thrilled for their next steps and adventures.

Our news?Us | Moving Peaces

Well, we love each other a lot. So, we decided it was finally time.

We’re going to…

South America | Moving Peaces

ARGENTINA!

We’ve been wanting to take a trip outside the country for awhile now and have been saving all of our pennies (read: all money from birthdays & Christmases, tax refunds and freelance gigs) for years. So, we finally bought the tickets, and we will be visiting this beautiful country for two weeks this spring!

At first you might say, “Aren’t you looking for a job?” and then question, “Is this really the best timing?”

You are not alone. I had all of these questions and more. But then we thought about a few key things and decided this was the best timing. Things have not all gone according to my plan this past year, but that’s not to say that it hasn’t brought some incredible opportunities along the way. We have been wanting to take a trip to explore the world a little, just the two of us, since we got married. There was always been something else keeping us, whether it was time or money or other logistics (oh I don’t know, like moving halfway across the country).

When you don’t have a job, you suddenly find yourself with a lot more time. As far as money, well, that’s something we’ve been saving for this specific purpose for years now. This last year without a full-time job has been tough and we’ve had to make certain financial sacrifices. But thankfully, we have been debt-free for a few years now and try to maintain a very frugal lifestyle. It’s a bit of a risk because of course we’re hoping that I have a job soon, but one thing I’ve realized this past year is that we don’t know what’s next. When the hubby asked for the time and it was approved, we decided to just jump at the chance and hope for the best with whatever else is to come this year.

Okay, so why two weeks in Argentina?

Why not? Alright, I know that’s not the answer you were looking for. To some, this seems like a lavish trip and to others in might seem like a small vacation, no big deal. Sure, I wish we could go for a month or more, but the reality is this is still more time than most people get to take all at once. I was able to study abroad twice when I was in college and knew then that it was not something everyone got to do or an opportunity that would present itself again. I feel similarly about this. Of course there are people who travel all over the world and have these awesome experiences, but to us, this is a big deal. This is something we’ve been dreaming about for a while. We see it as an opportunity to explore a different culture, see some different scenery and really invest in our marriage through a unique experience.

As to the location itself, we’ve heard a lot of good things and think it looks like a beautiful part of the world to see. It gives us a chance to brush up on some of that high school Spanish, see an epic waterfall and explore a continent neither of us have ever been to. We’re still figuring out what else might be in store during our time there but are also open to just finding out a bit while we get there.

That said, we’d love to hear any tips or suggestions should you know the area! We’re really excited about this, and I look forward to sharing about it more with you!

 

 

Four Years

Four Years

Samantha Gratton

Four Years Married | Moving Peaces

Four years ago today, we were wed on a perfect October day.

I know I just started a new series, but today is a very special day. I plan to blog more about “finding self”, so you might think that it would be all about me and my life this month. That couldn’t be farther from the truth. My husband has helped me see and understand things about myself that I lacked the confidence to realize on my own. My failures and shortcomings, my potential and capabilities. One of the biggest defining things in my life is that I am his wife. It’s part of who I am now and will always be. During the past four years of marriage I’ve learned more than I would have ever imagined. I’ve learned how hard it is to love, how easy it is to fight, how important it is to communicate and how much we need each other to make it through life.

 

Thursday Three

Samantha Gratton

Gee, I blog almost everyday for a month and as soon as we hit November go quiet for a week. What the heck? I’m going to partially blame studying for an exam I had earlier this week. Something about homework makes you feel like if you aren’t doing it then you shouldn’t be doing something else you enjoy. So instead you sit around procrastinating and not really accomplishing anything. But here we are, it’s Thursday. Oh blessed Thursday. Sidenote: “Bless” and all forms of the word is all sorts of Southern charm—something I’m learning to be quite a bit more cunning than we simple Midwesterners might imagine. 

1. Marriage brings us together... Over the weekend our church had a marriage seminar that was very interesting to say the least. All in all it was good to go but what I liked the most was that we made no plans for rest of the Saturday night when it was over so we had plenty of time to just hang out. We were totally adorable and laid the quilt in the lawn, surrounded by leaves and the lights strung from the tree to our house, and read a magazine together page-by-page. That was followed by a family band jam session and a walk through town. 

2. We’ve hit the anniversary stage with Raleigh. When we went on our walk we wound up downtown (it’s only a mile away) in the middle of a festival. It just so happened to be the same one we randomly came across a year ago when we hardly knew anyone and had no real friends to call. It was fun to reminisce and see how far we’ve come. We’re not always doing something new anymore but doing things twice, setting traditions and making memories. Before it was, “a year ago in Iowa” but now it’s, “a year ago when we were here…” Sorry if I sound like a broken record about that sometimes, but I still think it’s pretty amazing. It’s as if our relationship with Raleigh has really started to blossom and hit its stride. We’ve figured out some of the patterns and are getting into a routine together with this city. 

3. I love antiquing. Sunday afternoon we stopped by Vintage Village where several shops are all in a row and perused place to place. The bounty? Two necklaces, a ring, a cast iron rooster and a snare drum. Gosh it’s just too much fun to look through old stuff (junk and treasures really). It’s so interesting and inspiring to me. Whenever I go to a place like this I feel like a part of myself is realized and unleashed. I know the antique look is a little more trendy right now, but I often think I should have been born in a different era. The drum was a great find by the hubby, and I’m fairly sure he loves this sort of stuff as much as I do. It seems to have been owned by only one family before now and had all sorts of memorabilia from the 70s inside the case. The World’s Finest Chocolate Bars were apparently the fundraising tactic way back then—same label just a different expiration date. A lot of the things we find captivate us and adorn our homes but the drum might actually prove to be a profitable pick. That is, if the hubby’s ever ready to give it up. (Who wants to take bets?) 

Me + You

Samantha Gratton

There is one relationship that I value above the rest. When we’re talking about humans, my relationship with my husband matters more (only God can trump it and I said humans here). That doesn’t mean I don’t care about what’s happening in the lives of others or can’t be friends with people. Quite the contrary, but when it comes down to priorities, he comes first. Over a job, over friends, over school, over hobbies, over other family even. Having a good relationship in my marriage is beyond important to me. So I will do things that might seem ridiculous to some if it protects my marriage—whether it’s setting aside extra time or saying no to a good thing sometimes. In a society that sometimes overvalues a career or “success” I choose my marriage.

I can’t say I always know best how to do so or have the perfect relationship. I wish this was the case, but we are imperfect people who have to live in love and a whole lot of grace. We have misunderstandings and disagreements. Well-intentioned statements go awry or maybe even less than well-intentioned words slip. Gosh some days it’s tough to figure out what the heck we should do in certain situations. Some days it’s the most wonderful carefree thing in the world. Regardless, we made a commitment to each other to stick together. Nothing is allowed to mess with that. I will guard and protect this relationship with all that I’ve got. Because this relationship matters the most to me. Plus, the better we are, the better our other relationships will likely be, too. So if I ever seem to talk to much about him or us, this is why. He’s my guy.

See Me Run

Samantha Gratton

Saturday I considered writing about my goal to one day run a 5k. If you’ve ever mentioned anything about running to me in the past, I probably mentioned in return that I hate running. But come September, the Color Run will be in town and if you’re going to run, might as well have bursts of color coming at you to distract from the panting and leg wobbling. Instead of jotting that down, I decided to try jogging. I even got an app to direct me between walking and jogging so I could work up to it. And that sore calf from Tuesday’s yoga? It’ll loosen up.

Well, it didn’t loosen up. Not exactly. I got maybe a mile from home on the path when it felt like that left leg burst. It didn’t really but there I was, in the middle of a path nowhere near the street. I called the hubby and explained/whimpered/cried the situation to him. He came to save the day. I don’t know what I would have done without him because at that point, walking was not an option. He carried me a third of a mile until we were able to take the path into another neighborhood. Then he continued to run all the way back to where the car was parked and drove over to pick me up. By the time he brought the car around, my mind was made up, we were headed to the doctor’s office.

On the way over we took turns moaning in pain. While I had done something to my calf, he had strained his back carrying me. I randomly had a few suckers in my purse and we chomped on those all the way to the appointment, trying to focus on something other than the pain. He wheeled me in and asked for an ice pack from the front before sitting down. And then promptly returning to the front desk to request a second ice pack for himself. We were quite a pair. They took a few x-rays, put on a splint and handed over some crutches and a prescription. By the time we got home, all either of us could do was lay on the couch watching Netflix while we iced our respective injuries.

Despite the severity suggested in the first appointment, Monday’s doctor visit said otherwise. I’ll be on crutches a little longer and maybe do some physical therapy, but I’ll be alright. I’m very thankful to not need surgery or have to deal with this long-term. But most of all, I’m thankful for my husband. This whole ordeal was somewhat ridiculous, but it was one more reminder that we are in this together. And depending how long it takes to fully recover, there’s a good chance you’ll see me attempt that 5k anyway.

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