Sometimes being ready for adventure means ready to go, ready to leave. We can prep and get excited and begin that transition into a new change. It means new adventures, new possibilities and a new place to land.
But what about the adventure in staying? Seeing it through? What if there’s still more adventure left, right where you are? What if by leaving you’re giving up the biggest adventure of all?
Although perhaps not as glamorous, I’m trying to understand what that might look like. For so long I’ve been waiting to go and now I’m here. I love the change and the challenge going can bring. Yet it’s harder to grasp the depth of those challenges without seeing them through. Because if you’re always chasing something else, you’re never really able to experience the now.
As we pack up, write to-do lists and make countless phone calls we keep readying ourselves for this move. We’ve each made smaller moves before, and I moved a bit more as a kid. I’ve read the blogs and we’ve talked plenty with other people that have moved. We’re ready, right?
Unlike most practical people, we’ve decided to participate in Ragbrai a week and a half before we move. Ragbrai is a week-long bike ride across the state of Iowa that occurs each year in July. Neither of us have ever ridden it before, so we committed to do a day or two together (prior to deciding to move). For months we’ve tried to get some miles in and work our way up and down hills. We’ve read blogs, talked to others who’ve done it and bought some supplies. We’re ready, right?
What I’ve come to find is that whether or not we are ready cannot really be determined before we do it. We could try and compare to others and say, “if he can do it, so can I!” or “We’re in far better shape than they are!” But does it matter what they think or how we compare? Whether we’re ready or not, we’ll still have to actually do it. And guess what? I have a feeling my miles on the bike will help, but that it’s still going to be a challenge tomorrow. I’ll still feel the pain in my knees and sweat on my face. I’ll still be exhausted at the end of it all. And on mile 36, it doesn’t matter if I’m better off than someone else, because regardless, I’ll still have another 50 miles to go in the day.
I think it will be the same with this move. We can try to prepare and talk to others. We can read up and be told we’ll be fine. But we’re still going to have to do it, and it’s still going to be hard. With it comes stress and pain and exhaustion. No matter how much we prepare, that can’t be avoided. And we’ll have to face it. We’ll have to get through each mile whether there is wind, rain, sun or bumps. We’re going to do this move and feel all of the elements against us. It might be fine in the end, but there’s no denying that it’s a real part of what we’re taking on. I think I want to embrace that and acknowledge that, as opposed to trying to overlook it. With this adventure comes a lot of challenges and risks. There’s no point in sugar-coating it. We’re going to do it though, and do it together as a team and be stronger in the end.
I’ve wanted to move for a very long time. So long, in fact, that I’m not sure I’ll be as good at it as I would have been then. I love the stress of it all. Yes, the stress. There’s so much to do. A small window of time. The details. The to-do lists. It all sounds so romantic right now, but maybe that’s just because it’s been awhile. Or maybe it’s been far too long since I’ve needed more than a mini-van and a dedicated day and a half to get it done.
This will be our first move. Together. As a married couple. And you know what? No one really knows about it yet. We’re putting together the details now. It’s in a small window of time. There’s a lot to do and darling, there’s plenty of stress.
Not only are we moving, but we’re dropping a lot to do it. It’s not just about the move. We feel we’re about to embark on a new way of life. It’s exhilarating and terrifying all in one breath. We’re not even entirely sure what is yet to come.