On my last day of being a stay-at-home-wife before returning to work, I must say a few things to you, my future self. In this time between jobs I’ve spent many mornings and afternoons in a world only stay-at-home people know. It’s given me a glimpse into that life: mid-morning work-out classes, daytime grocery shopping, running errands, housework and time alone. Whether you have been given the blessing of being a stay-at-home-mom or even the blessing of still being alive, please keep the following in mind.
First of all, this letter is harder to start writing than I thought. At the gym this morning all of those ladies kept gossiping and complaining about every little thing from the person next to them being to close to the ways they lied to their husbands. It drove you nuts enough to write this letter. Remember that. Remember the way that just standing next to it made you feel icky and do not engage in that kind of behavior—gossip or foolish talk. It’s not hard to become that way but it also isn’t graceful, becoming or admirable. It’s a nasty habit, so instead decide to say and do otherwise and I promise your ability to make an impact will be greater without such prattle. (p.s. don’t stop going to the gym though—you need to stay in shape and stay healthy, regardless of your age).
Take note: Monday morning shoppers mean business. And good for them! While you might want to stay out of their way, I’m sure some sort of routine is good. Make a list and accomplish more. The weeks I went sans-list were not even half as productive as the ones with a list. While these small tasks and chores add up, they are still important. They mean you are taking care of your husband, your family, your friends and yourself. Stay motivated.
Go beyond what you know. Forgo the routine from time to time and open your eyes to another part of town, even if it’s just the other side of the street. Because there are people everywhere. People who need love and support and food and friends. You can give those things. Don’t be so motivated to tackle that to-do list that you overlook the needs of others in this city. Love on them. Welcome the “inconvenience” and share your joy with others. Serve in your areas of strength, and even serve in ways that you aren’t immediately comfortable.
With whatever time alone you have, don’t drown out all the quiet with extra noise. Spend some time in prayer, in the word and in reflection. This is the bottom line, not the bottom of the pile.
I don’t know what life will look like for you—if there are 2 kids or ten, a full-time job or freelance gigs, joy or mourning—whatever it is, don’t get lost in it. Don’t get lost in yourself, your plans or your routine. Look at the bigger picture and keep dreaming big. Invest in others and challenge yourself to do what seems impossible. Love. Love God. Love your husband. Love your kids (if you have ‘em). Love those around you. Love those who aren’t around you. Always love.
