Isn’t he handsome? Hubby’s first day of work is today, and I am so excited for him. Seriously. Life is crazy and within two weeks of moving out, he was offered this job. As of today, he is now a producer of a nationally syndicated radio show, and I’m sure he is just the guy for the job. Before his last job, he worked in radio and certainly knows the ins and outs of recording and producing audio. I’m eager to hear later today how it went and of course, how well that outfit suited his new workplace.
Things have been going well and moving quickly and yes, yes, YES! We’ve felt such confirmation about being here and God’s timing. It’s been a huge blessing, and we’ve been extremely grateful for it all. It’s all been so good. Not always easy, but so good.
Today, we decided it was time to stock our fridge so we headed to the nearest Trader Joe’s (naturally). Upon returning to our car, groceries in hand, we reached our first major speed bump (or as the signs say down here – “speed hump”) in the road. The car just wouldn’t start. Let me repeat, our only car just wouldn’t start.
It all became real very quickly. We had no friends to call, no way to get home and no idea why the car wouldn’t start. Thank goodness for AAA who promised to send a tow truck in the next 90 minutes. We took a moment to acknowledge what this felt like. This time of being stuck and alone with no one to ask for help. It wasn’t fun, but it is the reality of making a move like we just did. We knew we would have to face it at some point, so it might as well be the day after moving in officially. Then we did the next logical thing – took the refrigerated items back into Trader Joe’s and popped open a bag of chips while we waited.
The tow truck guy was there in record time and even dropped us off at our apartment before taking our car away. We don’t really know what that will cost to fix (hopefully not much!) or when it will be done. But I can’t help but thank God for his timing even with that. Honestly, I didn’t start this blog to “talk religion” – it’s not really my style. I think one’s life should be lived out and that’s the strongest testament of your faith. I don’t generally get all church-y or even want to be surrounded by people who are. My faith is real and it is true, but I’m not here to get in people’s face about it. I’m here to live according to God’s will and love others. But as I keep experiencing God’s kindness and grace and provisions each day, I can’t help but share about it. That car is getting to be up there in years, going on 18 years now. It’s had some repairs and probably needs a few more. But it made it halfway across the country. It made it to every interview we’ve had and through some dark, stormy nights in the middle of nowhere. It’s transported some of our most important documents, favorite clothes and our near future means of transportation (ahem, the bikes). When and where does it break? Outside of a grocery store, in a safe place, when we have nowhere immediately to be.
In the last few weeks we’ve felt as though we’ve been living off the radar a bit, and I can’t deny that it’s been great. Sure, we check Facebook and call our moms, but we haven’t had any real obligations. That’s not to say that there hasn’t been much to do. We’ve packed, unpacked, re-packed, unpacked and are about to do a full pack once more. We’ve changed our address, driver’s license, bank, grocery store and time zone. We’ve also been driving all over the state for a combination of vacation, job hunting, visiting relatives and exploration. We’ve slept in six different beds in six different towns in the last two weeks and have let our number of showers and personal hygiene go down a little.
We’ve had an incredible opportunity to just be. When we wake up, we wake up. We walk into any store or public place knowing no one will know us. On Thursday, we went for it and did open mic night at the bar down the street (hubby was the real performer, but I sang a number as well). We can try any church we want to or we can take a weekend at the beach instead. We haven’t kept in close contact with anyone really, which will change as we settle into a routine (and get phones with cell service). Ultimately, I’m glad we were able to have space in between as we transition from one life to the next.
Come Monday, we’ll be moving into our next new (more permanent) home for awhile. It will be good and challenging and different, but right now, I am grateful that we had the chance to take a break and catch our breaths. Although things worked out pretty quickly, I’d say having some time to transition slowly, to look around and to spend time together was the best thing possible. There’s a lot to sort through with a move. A lot of stress and thinking about what just happened and what’s about to happen. How we’ve stripped a large part of our lives away in exchange for one with more uncertainty. But I’m glad we did it. The more time we have to sit back and evaluate, the more thankful I am. We’ll miss things and people and routines, but it was time. Time to move on and embrace the change.
Over a month ago I blogged about why we were moving and on that list was to be closer to family. It had a star clarifying that while we’d be farther from other family, we still wanted to be closer to family. Beyond that, I think more clarification is needed.
Right now, we’re real close. I’m talking packed in the same house with a sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew. I get to hear “Auntie Sam, Auntie Sam” all day long and talk late into the night with my sister-in-law and brother-in-law. There’s an added sense of community and ownership with your family. Without kids of our own, our nieces and nephews are definitely people we want to invest in and see grow up into wonderful, giving people. It’s an awesome thing to be a part of, even in small way.
Today we’ll go visit the hubby’s grandma who recently celebrated her 80th year. We’re excited to be a part of her life and visit more than once every two years. It’s hard to know I’m so much farther from my grandparents, but I’m glad to be able to visit one of our grandparents.
All of this said, being closer to family was one part of this move. Family is a great and beautiful and even challenging thing. But it isn’t the thing. Only one thing can be the thing to plan your life around. The thing to put all of your faith, hope and love into is a relationship with Christ. When Jesus first starting calling disciples, they were in all different stages in life. Some left their family (Matt. 4:21-22), some left their jobs (Matt. 9:9). He called others to leave their wealth (Mark 10:21) and I’m guessing many left some friends, dreams and goals as well.
Family is a blessing and a gift, but it can’t be our main priority. Jobs are a great thing, and we’re called to work hard. Leadership and volunteering is an admirable thing. Growth and learning is awesome. All of these things are good, but not one of them is the “main thing.” Each of these can be important to have in life. But if you focus too much on one thing, what if you’re missing the bigger picture? What if following God means there’s so much more in store for you than a great job? Or weekly meals with extended family? Or another certificate to hang on the wall? What if these things, as great as they might be, hold you back from an even greater life of following Him?
I think I’m learning to value what we have in this life, yet be willing to let it all go. That statement alone is terrifying, but we can’t hold on too tight. It’s not ours. It may be a good thing and a helpful thing, but unless it’s the thing, we have to be willing to let it go.
Trust in the Lord with all your heartand lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him,and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6
Won’t Back Down – Original music by Tom Petty, cover by my husband.
This is the last song he recorded in the basement studio that is currently packed up and ready to move into storage for awhile, sadly. He came home singing this song one day and felt like recording a cover, but I think it’s easily another addition to the moving playlist. As he described it and I agree, it was “heartfelt” and furthermore, it seems fitting. There’s a lot we’re up against right now, but now is not the time to back down. It’s time to rise to the occasion and take it all on, full force.
When you start taking box donations from friends and local businesses, you never know what you’ll get. Luckily, our stuff will be moving in style. Because who doesn’t love knock-off brand adult diapers? Bonus: I’m sure our new neighbors will be dying to meet us once they see us unloading these bad boys.
Ever since we started talking seriously about moving, I’ve been considering “the list” – which of course consists of everything we need to do before we go. In order to do that, one must first define what it means to be from around here. What do I need to do here before going there? Which of these things declare my obvious residency and lack of tourist naivete? And then, do you do things you’ve done 100 times just one last time? Or do you do things you’ve never done but have heard you should do?
…
Over a month ago when I first drafted the above paragraph, I had high hopes of achieving the impossible. I wanted to live and breathe Des Moines, the state of Iowa and the entire Midwest as much as I could. While in theory it may be a good idea, it just can’t happen. Sure, I’ll try to see a few people in the next few weeks and use all of our Groupons, but we’ve got to start thinking about what’s ahead. There’s preparations to make, jobs to find and a house to pack. Not to mention, current jobs still to work and everyday life to live.
I think sometimes I try too hard to pack it all in. I’m constantly thinking that I’ve gotten better about overcoming my tendency to over-schedule. But I still find myself running around trying to do it all and pretending that in the end it will be worth it and we’ll be happier and better because of it. It’s the same trap every time. Instead, we wind up exhausted and annoyed about our commitments regardless how fun they may actually end up being. So, I think we will have to remember Iowa for the memories it’s already provided instead of the ones I was going to try and cram in during our final days. I can’t deny that our last week here is already packed full, but I will vow to try to reign in on the incidentals. These days aren’t about discovering Des Moines – they’re for spending time with established friends, packing and prepping to move and most importantly, being together through it all.
Tomorrow is the big day. Signs are made. Clothes are hung. Tables are arranged. Junk is ready to go out the door. I can’t decide if this was a good idea or a dumb waste of time. We’ll see just how much we can pull in from this effort. In my mind, I go back and forth between saying, “take it all away – free!” and “please, I need the money!”
Tell me this, is it tacky to have a jar out for tips and donations? Something along the lines of, “Take pity on us because we’re young and stupid and quit our jobs to move across the country. Put money here.”
With quitting a job and leaving a state comes a few changes. Some will be gradual and some will be immediate. As we start to pack our lives and mentally prepare, those around us also make a shift. It’s the way it goes. We knew this would happen and really, it’s healthy. But sitting around your co-workers as they whisper and plan their next steps, you can’t help but feeling like your time is already over. Your opinion is no longer needed as you slip through their lives and memories. Sure, these things need to happen. Honestly, I’m so glad that they are able to move forward without me. It alleviates some of my fears and stress with how this move would affect those around me. Now that people know what our plans are, not all plans made are ours. Other plans will be made, and they will be made without us. It’s good, it’s as it should be and it’s a sad realization all at the same time.
Like a lot of things to come this month, it’s bittersweet. Nothing about it should necessarily be different, but I want to acknowledge it’s very real and noticeable presence. This move is an adventure and a blessing, but it’s not all a romantic comedy.
