I’m confused. I’m freaked out. I’m conflicted. I’m stressed. I’m relieved. I’m excited. I’m hopeful. I’m defeated. I’m speechless. I’m overwhelmed. I’m terrified. I’m brave. I’m exhausted.
These are just a few of the current states I bounce back and forth between. The adventure has certainly not ended yet, and I’m starting to get the feeling that it never truly will. Recently, I took another little leap into the unknown. There’s some crazy to it with some good reason mixed in, too. The bottom line is – what do you want your life to be about?
For me, it’s not work, and work alone. While there’s more to discuss on this stance, for now, I’ll fill you in a little on the latest. That job that I got? I decided to leave it. The root cause? Work/life balance is a vital part of life for me, and it wasn’t happening there.
I have so many views on this whole ordeal as it wasn’t the easiest decision I’ve ever made, although it does seem like the right one. In some ways, I’ve never felt more empowered to actually stick up for myself and what mattered more. In other ways, I feel like an utter failure for not being tough enough to stick it out as I know there are certainly worse jobs in the world. For this tiny portion of time it feels like I have taken my good, stable life and traded it out for a melting ice cream cone. And then knocked the top scoop to the cement.
There’s a lot to figure out from here, and it’s all feeling rather tumultuous right now. Because not only did I quit, but they then asked me to stick around a while longer to work as a contractor. Where my life is going right now, I have no idea. Please see paragraph 1 for more details.
